Month: February 2012

French Toast Trauma


Crisp and soft at the same time

There are several things that easily get on my nerves…yes several. I won’t pretend to be considerate and possessing a mild temper. I can actually be explosive at times, that being said, I seldom am dramatic…I swear I’m not. I just raise my voice a few notches higher when I speak and my eyes tend to be a disturbing color of flaming red.

Well I don’t care, I just simply wanted to point out to you that several things piss me off; like a room mate repeatedly grunting in the morning when he wakes up, someone knocking on my door repeatedly even while the door is open and most of all….soggy, tasteless french toast. Its the worst.

The cook just happens to have me on a regular diet of the latter. Where he got the impression that its healthy and appealing I do not know, but after trying to seem cordial while passing him subliminals, I feel I have had enough at this juncture.
If he’s intent on clogging my arteries with cholesterol at least he could do it with some dignity. A fillet on the side wouldn’t be asking too much, preventing the slices ending up all soggy and saturated in not only oil but water would be most appreciated.

Yummy Breakfast

Now my idea of French toast is forever changed. If a professional can’t do it right then who can? I’m traumatized honestly.

What happened to the good old fashioned slightly crisp edges with the filling of the egg on the surface, thickening all the way to the middle of a slice where there was bound to be an undulating depression.

People might not know this but to me, French toast making is like an art, some sort of calligraphy, the hand movements, the moments of stress and strain as you whisk the egg, take out the bread slices and place them into the egg liquid.
The right amount of seconds you wait while the bread fibers soak it all in (making sure its the right amount). This art, has forever been tainted by this cook (i wonder if there is a Cooking council i can make a complaint to).

By now you will realize that this is in fact a rant, a justified one if I might add and I hope you agree if you are one of those who enjoys a delicious meal of french toast with a healthy spread of honey or jam on the surface, just to get that explosive taste in your mouth for the morning, then you flush it down with the right amount of coffee.
Pure ecstatic bliss.

Banana Bread Toast

I’m taking up French toast making duties from now on though, I’m not going to allow some guy who’s being paid to feed me, also kill me without style.
I advise you all to learn this beautiful art…the reward is in the consumption. Some will say a normal toast with a simple spread of jam or butter will suffice but that’s so…..English, like dry humor, you almost have to wear a dressing on your tongue to avoid being injured by a normal toast, besides, there is no art in its creation; you simply pop the damn thing in the toaster and it flies back at you like hell’s over crowded.

Viva French Toast!

Pictures courtesy: Esquire.com , sherigraham.com & zenmocha.com

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